September 12, 2014

There is no tiger...


 
...But that doesn't mean you take some serious fashion cues from one!

 
Vintage Fashionista Friday blog graphic for Chronically Vintage photo VintagefashionistaChronicallyVintag.png


{Who doesn't love a great vintage inspired headwrap like this wonderful leopard print cotton gem? It's cute, practical, fun, and such a handy helper when it comes to creating mid-century, rockabilly, and pin-up girl hairstyles alike. $14.00 from Eternal Magpie.}




{You're eyes will look especially fierce when you surround these fantastic 1950s tiger meets confetti clear horn rim style eyeglass frames, which are the purr-fect blend of mid-century fabulous and modern day appropriate cool all in the same go. $98.00 from Dia Vintage.}




{Reminiscent of late summer sunsets, harvest moons, fall pumpkins, these timelessly pretty orange plastic 1950s/1960s clip-on earrings are an ideal, lightweight way to bring one of the season's most iconic colours to your wardrobe. $9.50 from Chronically Vintage on Etsy. }




{Go on, I double dare you not to squeal with sheer delight over this immensely cute vintage 1960s kitty cat novelty print blouse! It's sweet, fun, and adorable - not to mention bursting with several of the finest shades from autumn's palette. Fits up to a 38" bust/28-29" waist. $86.00 from from Rococo Vintage.}




{Though we may still technically have a few more days of summer left, for most of us, the temperatures have already started to take a noticeable plunge and our minds are shifting more to thoughts of overcoats than swimsuits at the moment. If you want to stay roasty-toasty and look seriously chic in the process, than this awesome 1950s/1960s faux tiger fur coat is for you. Fits up to a 45" bust, full waist and hips. $155.00 from True Value Vintage.}




{Rich, luxurious gold tone metal and faux tiger eye plastic stones call this strikingly elegant, circa 1970s/80s does 1930s/40s bracelet home, and would make for such a fabulous, autumn hued piece of vintage jewelry to wear to your next Thanksgiving get-together. $25.00 from Chronically Vintage on Etsy.}




{My renewed summertime love for vintage reproduction swing trousers is going mighty strong as we look fall's return square in the eyes. As we do just that, I find myself especially yearning for pairs in dark, seasonally fantastic hues like these beautiful brown pinstripe 1940s vintage reproduction pants. Available in modern ladies UK sizes 10 to 18. £60.00 from Heyday.}




{Oh-la-la - and then some!!! This wildly alluring, figure flattering 1980s does 1940s tiger print peplum dress is all kinds of magnificent! From the "killer" pattern to the summer into fall perfect sleeve and hem lengths, this yesteryear frock will have all who see you roaring with praise about your ensemble. Fits up to a 40" bust/20-38" (elastic) waist. $29.00 from Bombshell Shocked.}




{At the moment, I'm tucking away my summertime accessories and bringing out my fall and winter ones, be they berets, boots, or gloves, to ensure they're all ready to go at at moment's (chilly!) notice. A gal can never have to many great winter gloves as these vintage appropriate brown leather beauties embellished with brass studs would look right at home in my - our your - mid-century wardrobe. Available in modern ladies sizes small to XL. $45.00 from Blue Velvet Vintage.}




{While we tend to typically associate them with spring and summer, there's no reason why vintage straw handbags like this good sized, classic 1960s beaut can't keep on serving us well come autumn, too - especially on sunny days when their flaxen hues call to mind fields of wheat, corn, and barley all waiting to be harvest. $38.00 from Dalena Vintage.}




{Suede high heels have been a favourite of mine for many years, with my beloved black 40s pair being one of my most currently sported pairs. If these beautiful brown suede 1950s pair was my size (they're a touch too small), I'd be adding them to my closet. My loss, is your gain, especially if you're hunting for fall time fabulous vintage high heels. Fits a vintage size 7AAA. $79.20 from The Best Vintage Clothing.}







What, dear Jess, are you talking about, you may be wondering as you read the title and introductory line of today's post. Allow me to elaborate.

You see, I am blessed to have a husband who is incredibly wise and insightful. I don't say that with any bias. If I knew, but was not married/in love with Tony, I would still say that he deserves to have a word like "sage" in front of his name, for he possesses that rare and fantastic combination of true intellect, stealth-like perceptiveness, deeply rooted compassion, the ability to see logic in any setting, and a knack for putting one's mind at ease, which is worth more than all the gold and diamonds in the world.

This isn't to say that he doesn't worry sometimes himself (how can anybody not?), but that of the two of us, I tend to be the one who worries far more - especially about things that are, objectively, not worth fretting over for two seconds, let alone days or longer. I'm no stranger to genuine anxiety, and stress and I might as well wear matching halves of a grade school BBF necklace.

I have a near crippling fear of confrontation and another of not pleasing people when I know they want me to do something (they're two sides of the same coin most of the time), as well as a workaholic's approach to business. My health is forever throwing curveballs my way that means I quite literally do no know what my world will be like, in some ways at least, from one day to the next. I am a recovering perfectionist (I was a major one as a child) and great fan of everything being in order, even though I know full well that life is never endingly chaotic.

This year, with the significant number of changes that have been underway in my life (especially on the professional front), which I chatted about recently in this post, I've been dealing with - what is in the scope of my personal world and circumstances - an unhealthy amount of stress and worry. As I discussed in that post, I'm working on taking steps to reduce that somewhat, but as we all know - such is easier said than done with it comes to scaling back on stress and work alike. Enter the title of today's Vintage Fashionista Friday post. You see, sometimes, when I'm having an especially difficult day on the stress/anxiety/worry front, my perceptive, caring husband will say to me, "It's okay, there's no tiger chasing you". And he is 100% correct.

Our brains (and nervous systems) are products of our human evolution. Once, long ago, we were traveling bands of hunters and nomads whose lives were constantly in danger. We developed certain internal systems and responses (such as the flight or fight response) to help us survive and cope in these harsh, life or death conditions. In fact, we lived in these kinds of circumstances for millions of years more than we've yet to dwell in cities, had weapons like swords and guns to defend us, and created man made barriers to keep the wolves at the gate, both literally and figuratively.

Yet, as with so many elements of how we behave and respond to the situations we find ourselves in millennia after most of us started to form civilizations and no longer live quite so on the edge of constant treats to our lives (or at the very least, not all of those same ones that our early ancestors knew on the plains of Africa), we still respond internally to danger and worry exactly the same way. We're hardwired to do so and overriding that internal programming is so hard, it verges on impossible.

How can you tell your brain, the epicenter of your emotions and thoughts, to just chill and take it easy, that most of the worries and problems we face today are not matters of our very survival and that, ultimately, you'll be okay? There isn't an easy answer to that question, but learning to put stress and worry into prospective can be a big leap forward there. Believe me, I speak from experience. Tony is also fond of saying (in situations that worry me), "What's the worse that can happen?", and he is so incredibly right – what is the worst that could happen? Usually, when you spell the realistic worse case scenario to a given situation out in black and white, it's not as bad as you've made the possible outcome to be in your head.

We may still have our ancestors responses to worry and danger, but we don't have their set of daily challenges. Now there’s a new, different, equally (if not more so) complex ones, which we may adapt to and come to handle differently in many thousands of more generations, but for now, we're still dealing with a hunter-gather's brain clothed in Nike shoes, Armani suits, Levis jeans, or - in our case - vintage threads.

However, we're very fortunate that there isn't (with exceptions made of course for those who still live in parts of the world where animal attacks are a very real threat) a tiger chasing us. We can stop, breath, take stock of our thoughts and circumstances, discuss our problems with loved ones and paid strangers (such as doctors and psychologists) alike, and decide how we want to take down the beast that it is our own worry and stress.

This is a luxury our ancestors rarely had when a wild, menacing creature was hunting them every bit as much as they had their spears aimed at the animal itself, and we're profoundly fortunate that such is the case, however we must be incredibly careful that we don't let stress us eat us alive, instead of a saber tooth tiger.

I share this topic today, which I know has rather little, objectively, to do with vintage fashion, other than providing a tie in theme for this fun yesteryear outfit, in the hopes that if you're also a chronic worrier and/or if something has really been weighing on your mind and bringing a lot of stress into your life lately, you can also avail of Tony's insight - so simple, yet so brilliant in its entirety.

Instead of running from imaginary tigers, let's access each worrisome situation as it comes our way, remind ourselves that we likely have the strength and coping skills needed to survive it, and spend our days far less consumed by stress and way more filled with peace, happiness, and all of the amazing things that we're fortunate to have in the 21st century - very much including our beloved fashions from the past (animal print or otherwise).

27 comments:

  1. That's the problem with stress/worry/anxiety...you leave your body in a high tension state all the time, and it has it's effects on your health (and mind, and heart, etc.) I too have had a hard time "letting it go", but I'm learning, and it's like a weight being pushed off your shoulders - or at least off your chest. :)
    Keep on working at it, but don't be too hard on yourself when you notice you're "backsliding" - it happens to all of us, it's simply a part of being human.
    Like it or not, you're a good person, you'll just have to accept that someday - hopefully sooner than later *lol*

    Yep, that hubby of yours is a keeper! ;)

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    1. Thank you very much for relating and sharing your thoughts on this topic with me, dear lady. I know what you mean for sure, but would like to say for the record that have never doubted that "I'm a good person". I (humbly) know that I am based on the choices I've made throughout my time on this planet and how I live my life everyday. I'm not perfect of course (far from it!), but no one is. I very much love myself (flaws and all), even if I do tend to be far too harsh on myself sometimes (a point that last Saturday's post delved into) and will certainly continue to keep cutting myself more slack, worrying less, and trying not to let stress/anxiety get the best of me when its out in full force.

      Have a wonderful weekend,
      ♥ Jessica

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  2. LOVE IT!!! really great picks :)

    Cathy Vargas
    Vintage Girls
    www.vindiebaby.com

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  3. This post was just adorable from start to finish! I loved the theme, some great picks. Tony is indeed most insightful with that comment, but stress and worry are strange, intangible beasts that are hard to fight. You know how if you have a recurring dream about being chased by something, the experts say that to break the cycle you have to stand up to the monster in the dream, confront it, and the dream will go away? Well, I've tried to do that but it's far, far harder to do in practice, it's like trying to swim your way up to the surface from far under the water. Good luck with taming your own tiger, it can be done, and sometimes we need a little help to do it (I'm a psychologist, have to plug my trade!) but it's not easy.x

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    1. As someone who has dealt with (always frightening) reoccurring dreams at different points throughout my life, I can totally relate. They are such horrible creatures - haunting our rest and leaving us shaken and haggard when we awake. I'm deeply sorry that you've faced that one time and time again and hope dearly that it disappears for you soon.

      Thank you for sharing your experiences and thoughts on this comment, sweet dear. It means a lot to me.

      ♥ Jessica

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  4. That's a really great piece of advice from your husband, and an equally grand source of inspiration for your post. I love all the tiger themed goodies you posted, especially that swing coat! I have a sort of similar one (although it's leopard, not tiger), and I absolutely adore it. I've had it for years now, and it goes with just about everything.

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  5. Very wise, Jessica. Many of us suffer from perfectionism and wanting to please others. If it's any consolation, this will gradually wear off as you get older and wise (like me!) although it never goes away entirely. In the meantime, please have a lovely, relaxing weekend!

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  6. That really is some great advice, and I loved reading this post. I get such bad anxiety and worry about everything to the point where I get annoyed at myself for worrying (and then I worry about being worried, oh dear!) It really is such a beast and can so easily spill over into affecting physical health, which frequently does for me. I had never thought about it from the perspective of our ancestors and evolution, that really makes so much sense!

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  7. Love these prints! I have always adored tiger and leopard prints… :D

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  8. I wonder if you've ever thought of learning self-hypnosis. (a psychologist or psychiatrist should be able to teach it). My husband is able to put himself in a light trance very easily and finds it quite refreshing.

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    1. Thoroughly interesting suggestion, thank you for bringing it up. For better or worse though, I know from past experiences working with trained professionals (in relation to the possibility of hypnosis possibly helping to manage some of my chronic illnesses, especially my GI related ones), that like a small percentage of population, I can't be hypnotized. I can, and do, meditate though, and find that both that and listening to classical music are great ways to calm my nerves when they get extra frazzled.

      ♥ Jessica

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  9. I am going to check out those ear rings on etsy now...I have that terrible anxiety to please also, as well as a hatred of confrontation or criticism. It is horrid.

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  10. As someone once pointed out (angrily) to me, it isn't always possible to be logical AND rational at the same time. Perfectly rational people do illogical things. Anyway, I wouldn't beat myself up too much over worrying. Luckily, you have a husband that understands and accepts that about your personality. The best relationships balance each other out anyway (my dad would panic if we got sniffles, and my mother couldn't be bothered unless we were bleeding from the ears).

    It is a good thing we don't have tigers roaming about as I think evolution cheated me out of that fight/flight response. I couldn't panic if well, tigers were chasing me. It drives the people around me nuts to the point where I think they would prefer a worrier.

    I am going to wear SO MUCH animal print this year. I am. I already bought a faux leopard coat and hat, but I see no reason to stop there.

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  11. From one chronic worrier to another, thank you! I too know objectively your husband is right. It's putting it into practice when your mind is racing that is the hard part, but I am finding I worry less with age. I think it's because I've go some perspective on what really matters now. I find asking myself whether this is something I'll still be worrying about in a year's time helps too.

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    1. That is an excellent way to look at things - it really, quickly puts them into perspective. The answer, so often is "no", and knowing that can alleviate some stress/worry in the moment for sure. Honestly, I often find that blogging about some of my concerns also really helps to free my mind of their heavy presence. I don't "tell all" of course, but from time-to-time, I run into situations where I know that nothing else with help restore tranquility for me quite like blogging about my worries/problems will and that is yet another reason why I am so profoundly grateful for my blog (and understanding blogging friends like you, dear Philippa).

      ♥ Jessica

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  12. the leopard/tiger blouse is to die for ... how fun ... i really like to ewar more brown this fall.

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  13. thank you - that is what i need at the moment!
    i have no fear - respect, yes - in front of "natural" dangers. but some people and our modern society can chase me into a mouse hole.....
    but, like in your case, i have found the best husband ever who helps me to come out of said mouse hole :-)
    the warm colored outfit you´r presenting here inspiring me a lot to change my wardrobe from summer to autumn!!!
    xxxxxx

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    1. You are sincerely welcome, my dear friend. It really motivated me on that front. I'd been holding tight to summer's palette lately, but the very same day I wrote this post, I wore a brown blouse and suddenly it felt like I was ready to embrace autumn's palette (which, don't get me wrong, I madly adore) again, even though I do wish summer could linger around for a few weeks longer.

      Tons of hugs,
      ♥ Jessica

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  14. Tony's saying is very wise and is well worth trying to remember when the worries start coming. As someone who suffers from an anxiety disorder I know how crippling this can be. Often my worries would make little sense to someone else or they think that they are not worth worrying about. Even when this is true it is not helpful when you are in the midst of it. I find self hypnosis and mindfulness, when done regularly, help me keep things under control.

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    1. Worries, I've long come to believe, are a lot like fingerprints. We all have them and they share certain points in common, but ultimately they're unique to each of us and no one's are any more or less valid than another person's. I sincerely appreciate you sharing about some of your battles (and management strategies) with me/us here, dear Kate, and want you to know that I both understand firsthand and am always here if need want to chat more (privately) about such things.

      Tons of hugs,
      <3 Jessica

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  15. I have to break down and buy a pair of heyday trousers!!! The more I see them, the more I adore them. And again I love seeing your items featured in your own posts. :)

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    1. You definitely should. They're an investment for sure (though Heyday does occasionally have sales that can help a bit there), but they're very well made and hold, as with all Heyday garments I've purchased so far, up excellently. I'd start with a versatile colour to get the most bang (in terms of wears) for your buck out of them.

      ♥ Jessica

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  16. I love those trousers but I am too much afraid to buy one, I am afraid that style can't suit me...
    (Too much hips I think... I would look HUGE haha)

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  17. ""There is no tiger." Wow, I love that. What a great little "stop and calm down" phrase (something I can often use). Your husband is smart. ;)

    He is right about the "worst that can happen", too. My husband often sits me down and asks me the same thing. The funny thing about we humans is not only is the 'worst' not so horrifying after all, but our problem-solving brains often become more occupied with possible solutions to the worst and the 'right now' than that which had us so fretful. Probably another throwback to thousands of years ago, but I'm grateful for it. ;)

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  18. Fortunately, I'm not worrying that much, and I have a child (who is an adult now, but the worrying doesn't stop because he's grown). But I'm a thinker. I wish I could put my brain on pause sometimes. I also use the What's the worse that can happen. It is really good to live by. I think Tony is the best man in the world (except my own hubby of course), hold tight to him. :) I love these post, they are so inspirational, so thank you for gathering them.

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